If I Were You Then It Would Be Me That I'd Go Home With

I met the most amazing guy the other night. A friend of mine has been taking salsa dancing lessons, and she talked to me about her instructor and his amazing smile. I thought she had a crush on him, but she suggested that I might want to meet him. (He is exactly my brand of heroin, to paraphrase Edward Cullen -- dark-haired, thin, younger than I am, poor, and not from the United States.) She invited me to her last salsa class and their graduation party at a club.

Normally, my answer to her invitation would be, "Thanks but no thanks." However, I have been considering what my work mentor told me about habits and how the habits I have got me to this point and are no longer useful. He was talking about work when he said it, but I see a broader applicability. I think when it comes to dating, I need to get outside my comfort zone to be more successful. In my experience, when I'm doing something outside my comfort zone (i.e., when I travel), I'm more open to meeting new people because I'm already doing something that makes me feel more open. So, I decided that since my knee-jerk response would be to decline her invitation, then I should accept.

I am so glad I did.

This guy...wow. He has a gorgeous smile and big brown eyes that made me finally understand what people mean when they talk about getting lost in someone's eyes. But there was something else about him -- beyond his scorching hotness -- that drew me to him. He just had the greatest energy. It made me feel excited and safe at the same time. I looked at him and thought, "Mine," and I've never thought that about any guy before. He coaxed me into dancing with him during class (by which I mean I scarcely restrained myself from flinging my body against his chest when he beckoned).

Unfortunately, this amazing man seems to have a more serious involvement with a girl we encountered when we went to the club. She, of course, is a talented salsa dancer as is he, so they have that in common. I talked to him a little, but there wasn't much for us to do since I don't know the dance.

The following day (Friday), my friend made me go to the restaurant where he tends bar at lunch to get take-out, and he and I talked again. He seemed happy to see me, and I was proud of myself for not leaping over the bar to throw myself into his arms. We talked for five minutes or so, and he encouraged me to take his beginner's salsa class.

I don't know what it is about this guy (other than the vague, unsatisfying and New Age-y explanation of his energy or vibe), but he has spun me right round like a record. I dreamed about him the last two nights. I really like him, and I don't know why. My friend thinks that girls throw themselves at him all the time (he's young, sexy, and an amazing dancer so that makes sense), so the way to get him is to play the long game and give him a chance to get to know me. I don't even know what to do with myself. I feel swept away, and I think I'm alone in that feeling, and I just don't want to get hurt or be disappointed.