Look Me In the Eye and Tell Me You Don't Find Me Attractive

I returned from my friend's house this morning after a great weekend. None of my concerns about how the weekend would go came to fruition. On the contrary, my friend and I had a great time, did some sight-seeing and laughed a lot.

I had worried that my friend and I might make a mistake and sleep together, but I wondered whether we might rekindle a relationship. We did not. I figure that if you get drunk with someone, sleep in his bed (without him) and swan around his apartment in your jammies and nobody tries to kiss anybody else, you have made the transition to friendship successfully. He looked great, as always, and he was as funny and charming as ever, so I asked myself why I didn't feel that tug toward him that signifies the yearning for romantic closeness, particularly in light of the fact that both my friend and I have tried very hard to keep the friendship together through a lot of ups and downs.

The reason, I think, is because he and I are very much alike in ways that enable us to understand but not complement one another. We have the same insecurities, so we can feel protective of each other and identify with each other, which makes us love each other very deeply. We understand each other in a way that only people with the same soft spots can. But we can't bolster each other. We can't be a team the way a boyfriend and girlfriend or a husband and wife should. I'm glad that I have learned that and that I went to visit him.