I Let the Melody Shine, Let It Cleanse My Mind, I Feel Free Now, But the Airwaves are Clean and There's Nobody Singing to Me Now

I miss the new guy. I don't miss him in the sense that I think I made a mistake in telling him not to contact me again, but I miss the way that he was when we first started talking. It was so nice to have someone paying so much attention to me, especially a good-looking, smart guy with a job to whom I was attracted. It was nice to have him calling me all the time and telling me how much he liked me. I enjoyed talking to him and telling him about my day and hearing about his day.

I think that's the shit that people really like about being in a relationship -- the small things. Most people are capable of finding companionship with their friends, and most people can find sex without having to embark on a relationship to get it. To me, what is really special about being in a relationship is having someone care about the details. I talked to the new guy about things like my dentist appointment or what I was doing at work, and he talked to me about the same kind of stuff. It sounds like it would be so boring, but it was really awesome to get to know someone so well that I was invested in the nitty-gritty of his day.

Unfortunately, the better I got to know the new guy, the more I realized that he was just not playing by the same rules. And I readily concede that continuing to invest in that relationship was going to result in unlimited streams of verbal abuse and possibly getting my ass beat. It is obviously not worth a black eye to hear about someone's doctor appointments. But I would like to find that again with someone who isn't secretly Ike Turner.